Niqui's Blog: Saying Good-Bye to 2011

Gosh what a year this has been! I am quite excited to bid it cheerful good-bye tonight (^^,)

This year I said good bye to two precious family members,

Dear Gran went to be with Jesus on Good Friday. I learned so much from her. The importance of being a lady, and I definitely inherited her flare and love for shoes. She was a stunner in her youth. She lived her life to the full.

She came to live with me for just over a month in the last stages of her life. I learned allot about myself through that trying time. I could see first hand how the choices that we make, will affect us forever. So it is wise to think things through before we take the plunge. Gran had a fierce love for her family, and that is a value that has most definitely been passed down through the generations. She had an even fiercer love for her Jesus. I can only imagine what it must of been like, when she met Him for the first time face to face! Absolute pure joy, I'm sure of it!

I used to see her once a week. I miss those visits.

Saying good bye to our sweet little Zac was so much harder for me. I still don't understand why his life was cut so short. I know that Father God does have the bigger picture. I stood unwaveringly in my Faith. I had a 100% confidence in God that Zac would be our miracle boy. In a way he was, I suppose. I got to meet him, and hold and kiss him. He impacted my life so. In his short time, made me really take stock of what is important in this life.

There are moments when I read the Word and the promises that are in there, I find myself saying "yes, BUT" I know that this is a road of trust that Jesus and I will have to walk.

Our sweet Mr. Wriggles.

He passed on the Wednesday just before Easter. And so unexpected as well. One minute he was playing with Jed and the very next moment he was paralysed! I held him in my arms, as the vet put him to sleep. He was our very faithful little shadow for 10 wonderful years.

Nix, loved him so dearly, she still does.

Our Rotti, Angel passed the same day that Zac did, 1 October. She was our faithful protector for 12 years. She was the most amazing dog. She truly loved the girls, and would always keep a look out for them. She loved it when they would ride her and sit on her. Even when Kenz came along, I would find her in Kenzies' room. She would let Kenz sit on her, even though her bones were worn with arthritis. She passed in her sleep. Sleeping in her usual spot under Janique's window.

I thought that it was quite symbolic that she passed the same time as Zac. I am sure that she is lying at his crib in Heaven right now. (^^,)

They say that every cloud has a silver lining. That is true of this year too. I had such a spiritual break through when I went to visit Mom. A dear friend Sally took me through a Sozo counselling session. The results were life transforming. I had such a special experience with Jesus.

I am learning to take control again in my life. Realising that I do have the power over myself and my choices. Learning, that I alone can choose my reactions to situations, whether good or bad. Learning that I don't have to be a control freak, and where there are situations that are completely out of my control, it is okay to let go, and rest in the Peace that Jesus has so freely given me.

I have come to know such a sweet love from Jesus. He is interested in me, and what interests me.

I have realised that the family I have is just perfect for me. I love each and every member. Each one of us is unique, and we all bring something special to the table. Yup even our sweet little Kenz, who has entered the two's with two solid feet in!! Oh my word, she has a mind of her own and an iron will!! Okay I am getting side tracked...heeheee...She makes us all laugh, and brings a sparkle into the room. Janique is blossoming into the most beautiful, sweet natured and tender hearted young lady, and Ashlynn continues to be our compassionate, tender hearted ray of sunshine.

I think about my precious Mommy darling all the time, I have teasured memories of the very special one on one time that I had with her, when I went to visit her in August! She is truly the most amazing woman I know! She sets the most wonderful example for me.

Spending time with Brett and Janni and my other darlings has been a balm for the soul. Tianna and Lee Lee are such sweet little darlings, little ladies who have this Aunty's heart. There are two of the bravest little girls that I have ever met. Having faced what they have this year, and still they are joyful and full of fun.

Without a doubt Jan is my very best friend. I love her with all of me. We have laughed and cried allot together this year. Our bond is stronger than ever. I honor her, and respect her. I so wish that I could carry this burden that she is carrying. But I know that this is her road to walk, and the very best thing I can do is walk with her.

Facing these tough times has shown me what Ian is made of. This man is my rock. A tender one (^^,) he loves his girls with such an intense love! Each one of our girls has a piece of his heart. And he is so generous with his love.